Wednesday, March 16, 2005

बचपन के मेरे मीत

Akshargram Anugunj

हम कलकत्ते में रहने वाले अपने ममेरे भाई से फोन पर बतिया रहे थे. अचानक वह बोला - लीजिये लल्ला बाबा से बात कीजिये और जब तक हम संभलें फोन लल्ला बाबा के कब्ज़े में था.

लल्ला बाबा उवाचे - आलो (यानी हलो, ये लल्ला बाबा का यूनीक इश्टाइल है)
हमने भी हलो किया और पूछा - क्या खबर है लालदेव?
पूरी बातचीत में हाल-चाल लिये कम, लल्ला बाबा की डिमांड पर सुनाये ज्यादा. जब घर भर के बारे में तसल्ली ले ली, जान लिया हमारी भारत यात्रा के बारे में, तब वे बोले - बहुत बात कर ली, अब फोन रखो. हम सिर्फ इतना ही पूछ पाये थे - लल्ला, कहीं विवाह की बातचीत चल रही है तुम्हारी? लेकिन फोन तब तक कट गया था.


ऐसी किंवदंती है कि लल्ला बाबा हमसे सिर्फ १५ दिन बड़े हैं लेकिन इन १५ दिनों के फरक ने लल्ला अर्थात विनय कुमार शुक्ल के साथ १५ से ज्यादा विशेषण लगा दिये हैं. गाँव के रिश्ते से इनके पिताजी हमारे मामाओं के नाना लगते हैं, इस लिहाज से लल्ला हमारे मामा के भी मामा (मामा स्क्वायर) हैं, ममेरे भाइयों के लल्ला बाबा हैं, हमारे लल्ला नाना हैं. पोस्ता (जोड़ाबगान का एक व्यावसायिक केन्द्र) में लल्ला बाबू हैं. चूँकि बहुमत लल्ला बाबा कहने वालों का है, इसलिये लल्ला बाबा ही सबसे लोकप्रिय नाम है.

स्ट्रैंड रोड पर जिस मकान में हम रहते थे वहाँ से बाहर नकल कर दाँये जाकर पहली गली में दाँये घूम जाओ, एक इस्तिरी वाला मिलेगा और उसके बाद जो बाँयी तरफ पाँच तल्ले (मंज़िल) का मकान है, उसी में तीन तल्ले पर लल्ला बाबा अपने पिताजी और बड़े भाई के साथ रहते हैं (थे - इसी बार पता चला कि लल्ला बाबा शिफ्ट कर गये हैं वहाँ से)

जहाँ तक हमें याद है हम लोगों ने छोटी कक्षाओं में पढ़ाई एक साथ ही शुरू की थी. साथ - साथ ही स्कूल जाते थे. लल्ला बाबा हमारे परिवार के ही सदस्य थे और अभी तक हैं. ट्यूशन भी साथ -साथ पढ़ते थे.

लल्ला बाबा कूल लोगों में से थे जो छुटपन से ही पान और पान-मसाला खाते थे और मुहल्ले का हर चायवाला, पनवाड़ी, मूड़ी (लैया) वाला, गन्ने के रस वाला, यहाँ तक मोड़ की मिठाई वाला तक उनको जानता था और श्रद्धा या सुविधानुसार उन्हें लाला, लल्ला बाबू, लाला बाबू पुकारता था. हम स्कूल एक साथ ही जाया करते थे. लल्ला बाबा आते-जाते गाय की पूँछ पकड़ कर लटक सकते थे, एकआध नेताछाप लोगों के साथ जीप या मोटरसाइकिल में घूम सकते थे, गली के लोफरनुमा लड़कों से दोस्ताना अंदाज़ में बातें कर सकते थे, यहाँ तक कंचे खेल सकते थे, पतंग खरीद कर उड़ सकते थे और लूट भी सकते थे. तात्पर्य यह कि लल्ला बाबा वह हर काम कर सकते थे जो कि हम पढ़ाई में तेज माने जाने की वजह से और अच्छे बच्चे होने की छवि का बोझ ढोने की वजह से नहीं कर सकते थे. इस तरह लल्ला बाबा हमलोगों के लिये वह खिड़की थे जो उस दुनिया की तरफ खुलती थी जो हमलोगों के लिये शायद निषिद्ध थी लेकिन लल्ला के स्वागत के लिये हमेशा पलक-पाँवड़े बिछाकर तैयार रहती थी.

हम उत्सुकतापूर्वक उनसे सुनते थे कि किस प्रकार नोना ने हाथ घुमाकर बम चलाया और पुलिस के आते ही बहादुरीपूर्वक छिप गया था. या कौन सा नया थाना इंचार्ज आया है जोड़ाबगान या बड़ाबाजार थाने में. लल्ला हमें गर्व भरी निगाह से हमें देखते हुए ट्राफिक कांस्टेबल से जाकर टाइम पूछ सकते थे.

लल्ला बाबा हमारे लिये शुरू से ही बड़े प्रोटेक्टिव थे. हम बचपन में लल्ला बाबा के साथ किसी पान की दुकान में खड़े थे कि उनके दो सड़कछाप मित्र आ गये फिल्मी अंदाज़ मे बड़े बाल, शर्ट की बटनें खुली हुई. एक तो लल्ला के साथ बातें करने लगा, दूसरा बोर होकर हमसे पूछने लगा कि यहाँ पास वाले कन्या विद्यालय में छुट्टी कब होती है. लल्ला की भौहें टेढ़ी हुईं, बोले - ए स्साला, तुम उससे ई सब बात नहीं करेगा, ऊ पढ़ने वाला लड़कालोग है, थोड़ा आदमी चीन्हके बात किया कर!
वह मित्र बोला - अरे हम कुछ अइसा- वइसा नहीं बोला, (हमसे), बोलो हम कुछ बोला क्या?
लल्ला पर इसका कोई असर नहीं पड़ा, बोले - ऊ सब हमको बताने का दरकार नहीं, आगे से हमसे बात करेगा ई सब.

हमारे बचपन में कांग्रेस का शासन था. सो सरकार और पार्टी लल्ला बाबा की प्रतिभा पल्लवित होते देख रही थी. कभी-कभी चुनाव प्रचार में भी आने-जाने लगे थे और इस तरह उनकी श्रद्धा का ग्राफ दिन दूना और रात चौगुना ऊपर जा रहा था.

लल्ला बाबा छुटपन से ही ज़िन्दगी का मर्म समझ चुके थे और हमें बतला चुके थे कि ई पढ़ाई - लिखाई से मिला है का कुछ भी किसी को. उस ज़माने में जब हमें स्कूल को मंदिर बताया गया था और पढ़ाई को सरस्वती, उनकी ऐसी विद्रोही बातें तो हमारा सिस्टम क्रैश कर देती थीं.
हमलोग दूसरी-तीसरी कक्षा से साथ ही ट्यूशन पढ़ते थे. हमारे ट्यूटर बनारस की तरफ से थे और उनका नाम भी श्री लल्ला चौबे था. उन्हें अपने नाम और शिक्षा से बड़ा प्रेम था. लेकिन लल्ला बाबा को पढ़ाने के समय उनके सामने पहचान का संकट उपस्थित हो जाता था और शायद इस वजह से ही वह भी लल्ला बाबा को हर दो-चार दिनों में पीटने का बहाना खोज लेते थे.

जैसा हम बता चुके हैं हमने पढ़ना साथ -साथ शुरू किया था और शुरुआती कुछ सालों तक हम साथ-साथ रहे. स्कूल वाले भी जी कड़ा करके लल्ला बाबा को हर साल खिसकाते रहे. लेकिन एक बार जब हम और लल्ला बाबा पाँचवीं का सालाना इम्तिहान दे चुके तो परिणामों की घोषणा से पहले प्रधानाचार्य ने लल्ला के पिताजी से बात की कुछ यों -
शुक्लाजी, विनय का प्रोमोशन तो बहुत मुश्किल है अगली कक्षा के लिये तो.
लल्ला के पिताजी तो एक क्षण के लिये सोच में पड़े फिर बोले - तो ठीक है आप जैसा समझें, न करें प्रोमोशन.
प्रधानाचार्य खँखारते हुए और थोड़ा हकलाते हुए बोले- नहीं, आप बात समझ नहीं रहे हैं, पाँचवीं कक्षा में नहीं फिट होगा ये.
लल्ला के पिताजी थोड़ा कनफुजिया गये, बोले - अभी तो आप कह रहे थे कि प्रोमोशन नही करेंगे!
प्रधानाचार्य जी ने कहने से पहले अपनी बात को तौला फिर बोले - मैं ये कह रहा था कि इसे चौथी कक्षा में डाल दिया जाय तो?
पढ़े-लिखे लोगों का तब से लल्ला बाबा की नज़रों में और पतन हो गया था. तब से याद नहीं कि लल्ला बाबा का स्कूल जाना कैसे कम होता गया, लेकिन एक बार हमने बैठ के सोचा तो पाया कि लल्ला बाबा अब स्कूल का रास्ता छोड़ चुके हैं.

अब भी हर फंक्शन लल्ला बाबा के बिना अधूरा है, हर आयोजन लल्ला की सलाह से किया जाता है. कोई भी काम कहीं भी अटका हो लल्ला बाबा ही आखिरि शरण हैं, चाहे टिकट रिजर्व कराना हो, बड़ाबाजार से कपड़े खरीदने हों, किसी के बारे में जानकारी प्राप्त करनी हो या पुलिस केस फंसा हो या हावड़ा स्टेशन से रात-बिरात किसी को चढ़ाना-उतारना हो, एकबार चिंता लल्ला बाबा के सामने प्रस्तुत कर दो. बस, अब तो चिंता लल्ला बाबा की है.

लल्ला बस खुश एक ही चीज़ से हो सकते हैं. हर काम के बाद या बहुत दिनों के बाद मिलने पर जब उनका हाथ प्रश्नवाचक मुद्रा में घूमता है और वही चिरंतन प्रश्न उनके मुखमंडल से फूटता है - क्या इंतज़ाम है? तो इसका मतलब होता है कि सोमरस का समय हो गया है.

एक बात और कि लल्ला बाबा को नियंत्रण खोते हुए भी नहीं देखा गया सिवाय एकबार के जिसके हम चश्मदीद गवाह हैं.
तब की घटना का असर कुछ दिनों पहले तब दिखा, जब आशू (हमारे ममेरे भाई) ने कालेज के होमवर्क की प्राब्लम हल करते-करते गलती कर दी और उसके मुँह से निकला - हत्तेरे की. वह यह भूल गया कि लल्ला बाबा भी वहीं बैठे हैं. उसने लाख समझाया कि उसने जानबूझकर ऐसा नहीं किया पर लल्ला बाबा मानने को तैयार ही नहीं हुए. उसे जो हड़काया कि वह अभी भी याद करता है.

लल्ला बाबा की उस घटना को मन को व्यवस्थित करके सब ब्लागरगण सुनें.

हम तीसरी या चौथी कक्षा में होंगे और साथ ही स्कूल से लौट रहे थे. लल्ला बाबा की चाल में और दिनों की अपेक्षा अप्रत्याशित तेजी थी और किसी पानवाले, चायवाले के नमस्कार का जवाब नहीं दे रहे थे. हमलोग मामले की नज़ाकत समझ चुके थे और हमलोग भी तेज ही चल रहे थे कि घर से कुछ १ फर्लांग दूर अचानक लल्ला बाबा ने माथे पर जोर से हाथ दे मारे और उनके मुँह से निकला - हत्तेरे की.
यानी अनहोनी हो गयी थी, विज्ञान के गुरुत्वाकर्षण, द्रव के अपना तल ढूँढ लेने के सिद्धांत, दबाव और बल के आगे लल्ला हार बैठे. कहा भी है-
पुरुष बली नहिं होत है, समय होत बलवान.


सो समय ने अपना खेल दिखाया और कुछ क्षणों की नज़ाकत ने लल्ला बाबा के रथ को जो उनके तेज से हमेशा ज़मीन से ३ इंच ऊपर चला करता था, ज़मीन पर ही ला धरा.


तो अगली बार अगर आप लल्ला बाबा से मिलें तो याद रखियेगा, 'क्या इंतज़ाम है?' का जवाब तैयार होना चाहिये.

75 comments:

अनूप शुक्ल said...

इस सनसनीखेज विवरण के बाद हम बावन स्ट्रैंड रोड कलकत्ता की यादें समेट के लल्लाबाबा का चेहरा-मोहरा टटोलने के प्रयास में एकाध बार हत्तेरे की कर चुके हैं सो नोट किया जाये.

Jitendra Chaudhary said...

ऊ का है कि ठलुआ नरेश, कि आप लिखते तो बहुत ही चकाचक हो, पूरी स्टोरी टनाटन है, लेकिन रोना ये है कि सिर्फ कभी कभी लिखते हो.आपकी सवारी का बोले तो ठीक वैसे ही निकलती है जैसे कुल्लू के दशहरे के मेले मे सारे देवी देवाताओ को साल मे सिर्फ एक बार पहाड़ों से उतारकर लाया जाता है, क्यों सही है ना? बहुत शानदार स्टोरी सुनाये, हमे भी जब कभी कलकत्ते जाना होना तो हम लल्लाबाबा से जरूर मिलेंगे.

और हाँ क्या इन्तजाम है?

viplavi said...

dada bahut jakkaas like hain.intajaam dumdaar hai.lalla baba ko sheegra padhana hai.humaari marketing bhi khoob ki hai-danyavaad.papa keh rahe the ki ab biliya per kuch ho jaaye.......biliya chacha ki ABBE THAALEE bolne ki ada badi yaad aati hai.zaroor likiyega unper..humlog intazaar me hain........

viplavi said...

dada bahut jakkaas like hain.intajaam dumdaar hai.lalla baba ko sheegra padhana hai.humaari marketing bhi khoob ki hai-danyavaad.papa keh rahe the ki ab biliya per kuch ho jaaye.......biliya chacha ki ABBE THAALEE bolne ki ada badi yaad aati hai.zaroor likiyega unper..humlog intazaar me hain........

Anonymous said...

विकिपीडिया हिन्दी में योगदान करना न भूलें
hi.wikipedia.org

Anonymous said...

waah dada waah....MAUJ AAGAY BACHCHA....bade dino se intezaar hai kisi naye masaale ka.ab use bhi poora kar dijiye.

संजय विद्रोही ( Dr. Sanjay Sharma) said...

"Thalua"

Tum lekhan mein to thalua nahin lagte Bhai.....bada badiyan likh mara hai sasur ke nati padh-padh kar sir khujayenge aur 'Hatte-riki' karte rah jayenge.....bol riya hun main....
Shresth lekah ke liye ek naye mitra ki badhaiyaan swikarein....

-Sanjay Vidrohi

Akash Mishra said...

बहुत इंट्रेस्टिंग कैरेक्टर हैं ये लल्ला बाबा |

आकाश

Anonymous said...

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